I am not a perfect parent, this I know but please don’t come to me when you are complaining about your home life. I have sympathy but when you are the ones putting yourselves in that position then it’s a little hard for me to feel bad for you. But I do.
To my mommy friend who complains that there is always a mess in her house, stuffed animals everywhere and the kids have no control over their bodies. To this I say, stop buying them stuff from the thrift store! Make them put their toys away! Make them clean up! You are the parent and the one in charge, you have the power to make them do what you want them to do, within reason of course. Help them go through their things and get rid of things that they don’t play with every day. yes, they will say that they love every toy and that every one of them is special somehow but really, when was the last time they played with toy frog that someone gave you at the baby shower? 5, 6 years ago? Get rid of it. Take the thrift store, have a yard sale, pass it on to someone who has a kid who into frogs right now but get rid of it.
To the one that says that their child is always talking back and giving them lip, stop them. I’m not saying that you have to spank them but if you stop them before they finish that sentence with the altitude that they have, they will learn. Don’t let them talk to you in a way that you wouldn’t let adults. If you don’t, they will continue to think that it’s ok.
Stop pawning your kids off on someone else. They are your children, you had them, you take care of them. And bad-mouthing your spouse all over town is not the way to get them on your side. It’s just a matter of time before someone tells the other what was said and that is just not pretty.
I understand that having children doesn’t come with a how-to book but you have to learn as you go. There is always something to learn and you have to open your eyes long enough to see it. Read some books, take a parenting class, learn from watching other people, something. We all have something to learn and this is the only way we can. From doing and learning. Good luck!!