Times, they are a changing

Well hello there. Remember me? No? It’s ok, I barely remember myself.

 

It’s been 3 years since I have had the chance to sit and write anything. and a lot has happened in that time. I was a stay at home to a wonderful little girl, married and living in an ok house in a nice small town. I was just starting to make friends again and starting to come back to the world. But that was then and this is now. Now I am different. And so is the world.

 

Now I am a widow, who will be getting re-married in April 2017. I have a 12 yrs. old now, not quite the little girl we knew. I longer live in a small town, I have moved to the big city (cue the theme song to “The Jefferson’s” ha ha) and I have very few friends here outside of work. Oh, yeah, I’m working again, full time. No more staying home and making cute little projects with my little girl Now it’s a struggle to get her to do the simple things like her chores. But we are not going to get started there. We are just going to focus on the good things right now.

Today is her birthday. Today she turns 12 yrs. old. Thinking back, I remember how I wasn’t expecting to have children at all, I was going to adopt. There are so many kids out there that don’t have a family of their…. but we are getting sidetracked again. Back to my child.

I remember how I was so freaked out about going into labor, that I was worried that I wouldn’t be able to do it and that something bad was going to happen to me. I didn’t want a C-section, I didn’t want an epidural, heck I wasn’t even sure what that was!!! And my anxiety of the whole thing only got worse after talking to my sisters, mom, and aunt!!! But focus on the good.

She is growing up. She is becoming more independent. She is becoming a young lady. She is growing into herself and that is all anyone can ask.

I caught part of a story on CNN. A mother took her autistic son, 2-3yr old, to a hair salon to get his hair cut. They were kicked out by the owner because the child was “out of control” and it was “unfair to her other clients” to have to listen to his crying. They finished the hair cut outside. There is also a post about it on Facebook somewhere.

Now one of their correspondents, I think, was saying that there are dentists offices, hair salons, etc, that have special hours for their special needs patients. That’s great. M’s argument? “Why would you take him to a public place to get a haircut? You know he doesn’t like it so do it at home?” Me? Why do I need to hide my child? There is nothing wrong with him that means he can’t be in public. There are plenty of “normal” children who don’t like haircuts, who freak out at people touching their heads, etc. so what makes an autistic child so different? Autistic children, in whatever degree of autism, need people to understand that yes, they have special needs, but they are still children. They can’t explain everything that is happening to them, they don’t always have the words to define what they are experiencing or are able to understand what they are feeling.

 

To parents of special needs children, I am sending you a HUGE hug today.

I don’t really care for Mother’s Day

Yes, I know that title may have caught some attention. But ti’s the truth, I don’t really like Mother’s Day. Or my birthday, or Valentine’s day. Those days are just not that special to me. They are just making the world, mostly men, feel guilty for not doing something special for us women.

 

Take Valentine’s Day. It was originally a day when a Bishop was beheaded for marrying couples outside of what the lords wanted. And now it’s a day of marriage proposals, elaborate evenings with your significant other, trying to outdo what you did the year before. And why? Because it’s your way of saying “I love you”. Why can’t you do something special on a random day for your spouse? Mother’s Day is a day when you celebrate what a wonder job your mother is doing, for saying “Thank you for everything you do everyday”, to Mom. But for me it, that is not he case.

 

For me it was just another day, true my daughter wanted to make me breakfast and did with the help of her Dad, but I still had to wash the dishes they made, wipe down the counter, wash a load of clothes, and did my Girl Scout duty. Nothing special for me today.

 

I wish all those that were treated to something special the best, to those that make it every day, I wish you love and happiness. I am just a very cynical person and today was not a good day for me.

Spring has sprung…….I think

Well we had the freakish winter. Living in the desert I don’t expect to get snow this winter we got over a foot and a half!!!! In four separate occasions! And having lived her for the past 8 years and not really had a winter, this was quite a shock to my system. I the heating bills were out of control! But that’s ok, that’s a totally different story. After Groundhogs Day, I was hoping for an early SPring, like he predicted, but we got another snow after that! So for the past couple of weeks it’s been slowly getting warmer and it’s been nice. But my nose is not agreeing with it. My nose is having problems. I need my allergy meds to kick in and for my nose to stop running but I guess I will have to wait until Fall.

 

Get out and enjoy the warm weather!

In the moment

I realize that Savie & I do a lot of stuff together but there rarely are pictures. Why? Because I am busy BEING WITH my daughter instead of of trying to get the perfect shot, the perfect picture.
It’s nit about that. It’s about enjoying the time I have with her, because she’s not going to be my little girl forever. I won’t Ned pictures to remind myself of the times we had, I’ll have my memories, the things we made, to remember that time by.
Be in the moment, not watching it.

On the road again

Savie is a Road Warrior. The two of us have driven to California and back, alone, at least 10 different times. We started doing it when she was about a year old and have made a trip almost every year. Usually it’s just to my side of the family and friends so we can get a lot done in a week. This last trip was to Idaho to see his family. Didn’t get nearly as much fun stuff as usual, and I know Savie was a little bummed.

He doesn’t understand that when you are going to have a 7year sit still for two hours you need to let them goof off for awhile first. He kept telling her to “sit down, settle down” but you can’t do that to a 7year old!!! I have flown twice with her, by myself, and she has been a dream. The flight attendants have loved having her on board. Even if they were just being nice, she was good on board.

Today she was woken up early, and made to get leave Idaho where she has had a blast meeting her cousins, visiting with family, and just having fun, to sit in a car for 2hrs and then be told to “be still’. When the two of us fly we get there a good 2hr early, like your suppose to, and then spend time walking around, looking in shops, being active until it’s time to board. this way she is nice and tired and not so antsy to move around once we are on the plane.

 

But the upside is we are home, she is in bed, and I have some time to relax before tomorrow (ha ha). Here’s to getting back to normal and having a a normal day.

Say “excuse me”

I was in the grocery store today with my daughter, pushing the shopping cart when I came cart to cart with a couple of teenagers. I stopped and waited for them to move to the side. They stopped, waited, and didn’t move. I motioned that I was going in the aisle that they were blocking and they finally moved out of the way. As I walked by them I said, loud enough for them to hear, “That’s why you walk to the right”. All I heard was “Well, excuse me” from the little girl, with an attitude.

When did it become standard practice to not say “excuse me” when you walk by people? For youngsters to be so rude to their elders, true I’m only 10 years older than the kids I was talking to today, but still you get the point. There was no respect in their tone of voice or the way they looked at me. That is not the way I am raising my daughter. There are certain things that should, no HAVE to be taught to our children so they grow up with respect for other people.

  • say please and thank you.
  • say excuse me when you walk in front of someone
  • walk to the right so oncoming traffic and pass
  • listen to your elders, even slight, when speaking

i remember these things when I was growing. I didn’t talk back to my parents, I didn’t yell at them, or hit them. When did things change? Kids these days are just rude, no mannered heathens. I’m sorry if I offend parents when I correct their kids when they don’t but someone needs to do it.